OP02-04-2020, 04:41 PM
(This post was last modified: 02-04-2020, 06:49 PM by Typhon.)
Id like to start with please take my experiences and learn from them and dont do what Ive done.
This story isnt here to gain any clout on an account market/forum. I wrote this to give awareness to those who may be curious about drugs and those who I see posting on here asking questions about certain drugs or claiming to do hard drugs ect. I understand most likely 90%+ of the people reading this will not matter to you, but there are a small minority of people on this forum who are suffering with substance abuse. Between me lurking the forums and everyone Ive met on Xbox theres a lot of hidden substance abuse that goes on. This is also for those whom are younger and curious but dont know what theyre doing I want to spread my some information, resources, and my story for them to read.
First off, all Drugs are bad in some way, yes including cannabis. Theyre not bad in a moral scene but putting anything inside your body will have side effects, cannabis/weed for example smoking or vaping any plant matter is not good for your lungs. Will it kill you? No. But its not "healthy" either. My point im trying to make is that everything you put inside your body will have some sort of effect on it. If you currently use drugs or are planning on trying a new substance you should research and read as much as you can about the substance before taking it, including softer drugs that are physically safe, that you cant overdose and die on such as cannabis, mushrooms ect. But you should always know what youre taking, the dose, and how to use responsibly if youre going to use at all. If you want to use drugs, please stick to to soft drugs. Again, im repeating this again; even though theyre "soft drugs" you still need to treat all drugs with respect.
Substance abuse statistics;
Almost 21 million Americans have at least one addiction, yet only 10% of them receive treatment.
Drug overdose deaths have more than tripled since 1990.
From 1999 to 2017, more than 700,000 Americans died from overdosing on a drug.
Alcohol and drug addiction cost the U.S. economy over $600 billion every year.
In 2017, 34.2 million Americans committed DUI, 21.4 million under the influence of alcohol and 12.8 million under the influence of drugs.
About 20% of Americans who have depression or an anxiety disorder also have a substance use disorder.
More than 90% of people who have an addiction started to drink alcohol or use drugs before they were 18 years old.
Americans between the ages of 18 and 25 are most likely to use addictive drugs.
Alcohol use statistics;
Every year, worldwide, alcohol is the cause of 5.3% of deaths (or 1 in every 20).
About 300 million people throughout the world have an alcohol use disorder.
On average, 30 Americans die every day in an alcohol-related car accident, and six Americans die every day from alcohol poisoning.
About 88,000 people die as a result of alcohol every year in the United States.
About 6% of American adults (about 15 million people) have an alcohol use disorder, but only about 7% of Americans who are addicted to alcohol ever receive treatment.
Men between the ages of 18 and 25 are most likely to binge drink and become alcoholics.
In 2017, approximately 2.3 million Americans between the ages of 12 and 17 and 2.4 million Americans between the ages of 18 and 25 started to drink alcohol.
In 2018, a historically-low percentage of American high school students reported drinking alcohol. Only 18% of 10th graders and 30% of 12th graders admitted to drinking underage in 2018 compared to 25% of 10th graders and 39% of 12th graders in 2013.
Opiate/Opioid info/use statistics
Opioids are a class of drugs which block sensations of pain and cause euphoria. They are dangerous because they pose very high risks for addiction and overdose. Opioids are an ingredient in many pain-relieving medications. Since they are controlled substances, drug traffickers also sell them illegally. Opioids, both illegal and prescribed, have caused a surge of deaths in the United States in the past two decades
About 130 Americans die every day from an opioid overdose.
From 1999 to 2017, 399,230 Americans lost their lives to opioids.
In 2017 alone, 47,600 fatal overdoses occurred in America which involved at least one opioid.
In 2017, doctors issued 191,218,272 opioid prescriptions, a slight decline from the 200,000,000 opioid prescriptions which they issued every year from 2006 to 2016.
Since 1999, the sale of opioid painkillers has skyrocketed by 300%.
About 20% to 30% of people who take prescription opioids misuse them.
2 million Americans misused prescription opioids for the first time in 2017.
About 10% of people who misuse prescription opioids become addicted to opioids.
Approximately 2.1 million Americans have an opioid use disorder.
About 5% of people with an opioid use disorder will try heroin.
Heroin/Fentanyl info/Statistics
Heroin is a powerful and addictive opioid. It is an illegal drug which poses serious risks for overdose. Heroin, especially heroin mixed with fentanyl, has been a major contributor to the opioid epidemic in the United States.
About 494,000 Americans over the age of 12 are regular heroin users.
In 2017, 886,000 Americans used heroin at least once.
About 25% of people who try heroin will become addicted.
In 2017, 81,000 Americans tried heroin for the first time.
Over 15,000 Americans died from a heroin overdose in 2017.
"Soft Drugs' Psychedelics demand respect; do your research before hand always
cannabis, LSD, Shrooms (psilocybin), DMT, mescaline, nitrous oxide.
"Middle ground" Do your research, use responsibly, with moderation.
Caffeine, MDMA, Ketamine, benzos, (xanax, klonopin, valium) amphetamines (adderall, vyvanse)
"Hard drugs" STAY THE FUCK AWAY IDGAF YOUVE BEEN WARNED
Alcohol (Yes alcohol is a hard drug esp liquor. It will destroy your body and kills more people, nicotine (cigarettes) methamphetamine, cocaine, Opioids/Opiates (Lean/Codeine, Morphine, hydrocodone, oxycodone, heroin (diamorphine))
Some great websites to use for doing research and reading other peoples experience reports are;
erowird.ord
psychonautwiki.org
Notice****
If anyone whos reading this and is struggling with their substance use/abuse or have some questions about certain substances and would like to talk about anything or get some advice or help feel free to PM me here onsite. Ive studied substance pharmacology, neurology, and chemistry behind every substance you could ever possibly think of. If youre struggling with stopping/slowing down the amount of weed/cannabis you smoke or if youre an IV methamphetamine addict and needs help feel free to PM me. Ill be more then glad to talk with you.
I started smoking cannabis 4 months before my 13th birthday. Was hanging out with the older kids 16-18 thinking they were cool and one day one of then had what they used to call "crippy" which was the slang for good weed back then, this was probably 2009/10ish and good weed was $20/gram. Or you could get mexican/zone which was very seedy weed but atleast green or you had reggie which was mexican brick weed. It was normally almost a brownish color and completely flat. Full of seeds/stems and other crap they used to put in it, you newer kids have no idea how good youll got it haha the weed now esp the exotic AAA shit would sell for $25-30/gram probually all day long, or hash oil $100/gram.
Anyways I got caught with a metal $5 pipe a sold to a kid in middle school on a friday but the kid brought it back to school and was pretending to use it in the lunch room and a fucking cop saw him playing with it, so the cop takes him and he snitches on me and I almost get expelled. My parents then took me to a psych Dr and the Dr put me on vyvanse 20mg (lisdextamfetamine) which is an amphetamine just like Adderall (DextroAmphetamine/LevoAmphetamine) D-Amphetamine is the feel good part of Adderall which adderall is 74% D-amp. Vyvanse is D-Amp attached to a protein so you have to take it orally for it to work, its made like that so kids can snort them like they do with adderall sometimes lol anyways I started experimenting with it and for me it wasnt great but 20mg the dose I ggot is prob equal to only 5mg of adderall to anyone whos tried it before. I didnt really enjoy it but didnt dislike it I guess.
When I was 14 the same person who got me into smoking weed for the first time also got me into using synthetic cannabinoids. Its known best probably in the USA as k2 or in Europe as spice. It was way cheaper then buying weed at $15-20/g when you could get a 3g bag of the shit for $15 and its way way stronger. The older original brands weren't as bad as they later got. Every time they banned the cannabinoids they were using the cannabiniods they used got worse/more dangerous/even deadly. The first kind I had was K2 Kush, which honestly felt very similar to real weed, it was great I loved it. Shortly after tho they banned the chem they were using JWH-018. and they started using AM-2201, HU-210 and others. Some of the 2nd gen blends I smoked were Kush, Scooby Snax, Cloud 9, Mr Nice Guy, Cautian, and a few others. Eventually those were all banned and the next wave of chemicals afterwards became much more fiendish, intense, dangerous, and even addictive with withdrawal symptoms after stopping use. One brand off the top of my head I remember was shamerocks. The last time I ever used any syn cannabinoids I accidently smoked a whole bowl of the shamerocks and I turned white and passed out. I had visions that I died and became apart of the universe. But I was okay with being dead because I knew my family and friends would eventually come to be apart of this universe with me. I was in this state that felt like it happenend forever time was so slowed down. But eventually I woke up, and had to puke as soon as I woke up.
I suffered from depersonalization for the next year or so where everything felt fake/not real like I wasnt alive and nothing is real. I begain to thing my heart was going to stop at any moment and had panic attacks everyday for weeks at a time. It fucked my world up, so I started doing different drugs to help numb it.
Later on the christmas before I turned 16 I found an 80z bottle of cherratusin in my house that was basically full (codeine/Guaifenesin) and is the shitty/nastier tasting version of lean which is codeine/promethazine. I drank it all that night/morning and played Halo 4 on Christmas day. That was the first time I did Opiates and I feel in love with the feeling it made me content, took the anxiety away and the depersonalization would be gone.
I later researched opiates/opioids and found someone who could get Vicodin 5mg (hydrocodone/acetaminophen) I was paying $5 per pill (overpriced) but I feel in love with the feeling. to me it was warm and fuzzy, the world felt perfect, it was blissfully numb.
Later on around age 15 to age 16 I started experimenting with all kinds of drugs. I got my own connect for weed this was around 2015 I was paying $15/g for the "good" stuff. One day my weed dealer asked if I wanted to try some white or cocaine and I said sure why not lol to me cocaine sucks unless is really high purity. I did a $40 bag worth then later on I bought a $50 all in one rock and read online how to freebase cocaine so I did it and made crack in a spoon and smoked it off foil and holy shit it was incredibly intense/felt so good it scared haha. I didnt do cocaine in any forum for a few years afterwatds.
My dealer had gotten some "Molly" which im not sure if it was true MDMA or if it was methylone (bk-MDMA) but holy shit I ate prob 300mg and was rolling fucking tits! I was rolling fucking balls. Made everything feel wonderful and loved everyone around me. haha I also later on experimented with LSD (Lyesrgic acid diethylamide) and mushrooms (psilocybin/Psilocin) I wont go into my experiences with psychedelics in this because they are both drugs and tools that can be used to help better yourself. Psychedelics changed my mindset for the good and really opened my mind up to new ideas and thoughts, and have taken to to places deep in my mind. I still trip every now and then most LSD and I order it off the darkweb because its so easy to do and the price.
Around this time my anxiety/depersonalization had gotten better, I still had it but as I matured mentally I grew stronger to learn how to deal with
Later on I found other plugs for (10mg hydrocodone) Vicodin/oxycodone (percocet 10mg) then found a plug for blues (Oxycodone 30mg IR) and Dilaudids (hydromorphone 8mg) and was snorting them for about a year till eventually I started IVing the hydromorphone bc both the blues/Ds were $30 each, however IVing a quarter of a D felt equal to a blue. So I started getting way more bang for mu buck, however eventually H moved into the town and all the hoods in my area started selling a ton of H (diamorphine) so I started IVing it then slowly they started adding fentanyl and related analogs such as acetylfentanyl/furanylfentanyl (got arrested with "fentdope"and they tested the dope in the lab and came back as furanylfentanyl) along with others and sometimes selling straight Fent instead of actual H (diamorphine). I hated getting straight fentanyl because MOST fentanyl and its analogs only last an hour or 2 MAX like youll be sober ina hour sometimes so Id have to re dose all day long, Making my tolerance skyrocket and having to spend tons and tons of money on the shit, sold everything I owe lived in a room with absolutely nothing of value because everything was gone. Ive easily spend $30k possibly on the shit, I started selling it/middlemaning too. Ive had to give 2 people narcan/breath for the other one bc they ODed.
Eventually tho; one time in May of 2018 I got some near pure either 3-Methylfentanyl/carfentanil strength stuff thats 1000-3000x stronger then morphine and lasts wayyy longer then normal fent like 8 hours long and ended up overdosing really bad. I was out for almost 8 hours before someone found me barely breathing the entire time. By the time someone found me and got me to the hospital I was flat linning, they did CPR on me for over and hour before my heart started working again, they gave me 20mg of IV narcan/naloxone which is 10x the regular amount for an overdose. But eventually they got my heart going again, it stopped again for another 5 mins but then they got it working again. The Drs gave me less then 10% chance to live and even if I did they told my parents I would be a vegetable. Also ended up having stage 4 kidney failure, my pee was black. Had to be on blood dialysis which hooks me up via IV to a machine that filters/cleans my blood for me so my kidneys dont have to and they can heal. They ended up giving me tons of morphine, fentanyl, and 30mg oxycodone every 4-6 hours, even tho at that time my tolerence was so high from my fentanyl habit, they atleast made things slightly bearable. Once I got out the hospital after my kidneys healed and was good after a few weeks. Once I got out I got onto suboxone (buprenorphine) which is a slow acting opioid itself for my opioid withdrawals and helps withe cravings a lot, I snort them and get a nice opioid "glow" during the day, I dont get fucked up or anything and Im super functional while on it. I still smoke weed/oil every now and then, ill use opana or similar pharma pill once every blue moon bc I know the dose, and I take xanax and will trip every now and then. I can honestly say im much better today then Ivve been in a long time.
I may update some parts or add more details to this story, like I said ive been in jail, Ive been homeless, Ive been in some very dark places. But ever since I woke up front flat linning my mood/personality has changed and my outlook on life has changed dramatically When I was at my worst in my addiction to opioids I didnt care about dying. . People wouldnt let me use around them bc they were worried ima OD with them in the car.
Anyways Id like to hear everyone's feedback. Appreciate it.
This story isnt here to gain any clout on an account market/forum. I wrote this to give awareness to those who may be curious about drugs and those who I see posting on here asking questions about certain drugs or claiming to do hard drugs ect. I understand most likely 90%+ of the people reading this will not matter to you, but there are a small minority of people on this forum who are suffering with substance abuse. Between me lurking the forums and everyone Ive met on Xbox theres a lot of hidden substance abuse that goes on. This is also for those whom are younger and curious but dont know what theyre doing I want to spread my some information, resources, and my story for them to read.
First off, all Drugs are bad in some way, yes including cannabis. Theyre not bad in a moral scene but putting anything inside your body will have side effects, cannabis/weed for example smoking or vaping any plant matter is not good for your lungs. Will it kill you? No. But its not "healthy" either. My point im trying to make is that everything you put inside your body will have some sort of effect on it. If you currently use drugs or are planning on trying a new substance you should research and read as much as you can about the substance before taking it, including softer drugs that are physically safe, that you cant overdose and die on such as cannabis, mushrooms ect. But you should always know what youre taking, the dose, and how to use responsibly if youre going to use at all. If you want to use drugs, please stick to to soft drugs. Again, im repeating this again; even though theyre "soft drugs" you still need to treat all drugs with respect.
Substance abuse statistics;
Almost 21 million Americans have at least one addiction, yet only 10% of them receive treatment.
Drug overdose deaths have more than tripled since 1990.
From 1999 to 2017, more than 700,000 Americans died from overdosing on a drug.
Alcohol and drug addiction cost the U.S. economy over $600 billion every year.
In 2017, 34.2 million Americans committed DUI, 21.4 million under the influence of alcohol and 12.8 million under the influence of drugs.
About 20% of Americans who have depression or an anxiety disorder also have a substance use disorder.
More than 90% of people who have an addiction started to drink alcohol or use drugs before they were 18 years old.
Americans between the ages of 18 and 25 are most likely to use addictive drugs.
Alcohol use statistics;
Every year, worldwide, alcohol is the cause of 5.3% of deaths (or 1 in every 20).
About 300 million people throughout the world have an alcohol use disorder.
On average, 30 Americans die every day in an alcohol-related car accident, and six Americans die every day from alcohol poisoning.
About 88,000 people die as a result of alcohol every year in the United States.
About 6% of American adults (about 15 million people) have an alcohol use disorder, but only about 7% of Americans who are addicted to alcohol ever receive treatment.
Men between the ages of 18 and 25 are most likely to binge drink and become alcoholics.
In 2017, approximately 2.3 million Americans between the ages of 12 and 17 and 2.4 million Americans between the ages of 18 and 25 started to drink alcohol.
In 2018, a historically-low percentage of American high school students reported drinking alcohol. Only 18% of 10th graders and 30% of 12th graders admitted to drinking underage in 2018 compared to 25% of 10th graders and 39% of 12th graders in 2013.
Opiate/Opioid info/use statistics
Opioids are a class of drugs which block sensations of pain and cause euphoria. They are dangerous because they pose very high risks for addiction and overdose. Opioids are an ingredient in many pain-relieving medications. Since they are controlled substances, drug traffickers also sell them illegally. Opioids, both illegal and prescribed, have caused a surge of deaths in the United States in the past two decades
About 130 Americans die every day from an opioid overdose.
From 1999 to 2017, 399,230 Americans lost their lives to opioids.
In 2017 alone, 47,600 fatal overdoses occurred in America which involved at least one opioid.
In 2017, doctors issued 191,218,272 opioid prescriptions, a slight decline from the 200,000,000 opioid prescriptions which they issued every year from 2006 to 2016.
Since 1999, the sale of opioid painkillers has skyrocketed by 300%.
About 20% to 30% of people who take prescription opioids misuse them.
2 million Americans misused prescription opioids for the first time in 2017.
About 10% of people who misuse prescription opioids become addicted to opioids.
Approximately 2.1 million Americans have an opioid use disorder.
About 5% of people with an opioid use disorder will try heroin.
Heroin/Fentanyl info/Statistics
Heroin is a powerful and addictive opioid. It is an illegal drug which poses serious risks for overdose. Heroin, especially heroin mixed with fentanyl, has been a major contributor to the opioid epidemic in the United States.
About 494,000 Americans over the age of 12 are regular heroin users.
In 2017, 886,000 Americans used heroin at least once.
About 25% of people who try heroin will become addicted.
In 2017, 81,000 Americans tried heroin for the first time.
Over 15,000 Americans died from a heroin overdose in 2017.
"Soft Drugs' Psychedelics demand respect; do your research before hand always
cannabis, LSD, Shrooms (psilocybin), DMT, mescaline, nitrous oxide.
"Middle ground" Do your research, use responsibly, with moderation.
Caffeine, MDMA, Ketamine, benzos, (xanax, klonopin, valium) amphetamines (adderall, vyvanse)
"Hard drugs" STAY THE FUCK AWAY IDGAF YOUVE BEEN WARNED
Alcohol (Yes alcohol is a hard drug esp liquor. It will destroy your body and kills more people, nicotine (cigarettes) methamphetamine, cocaine, Opioids/Opiates (Lean/Codeine, Morphine, hydrocodone, oxycodone, heroin (diamorphine))
Some great websites to use for doing research and reading other peoples experience reports are;
erowird.ord
psychonautwiki.org
Notice****
If anyone whos reading this and is struggling with their substance use/abuse or have some questions about certain substances and would like to talk about anything or get some advice or help feel free to PM me here onsite. Ive studied substance pharmacology, neurology, and chemistry behind every substance you could ever possibly think of. If youre struggling with stopping/slowing down the amount of weed/cannabis you smoke or if youre an IV methamphetamine addict and needs help feel free to PM me. Ill be more then glad to talk with you.
My story through Hell and back - Unfinished, will be adding more details soon
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________-_I started smoking cannabis 4 months before my 13th birthday. Was hanging out with the older kids 16-18 thinking they were cool and one day one of then had what they used to call "crippy" which was the slang for good weed back then, this was probably 2009/10ish and good weed was $20/gram. Or you could get mexican/zone which was very seedy weed but atleast green or you had reggie which was mexican brick weed. It was normally almost a brownish color and completely flat. Full of seeds/stems and other crap they used to put in it, you newer kids have no idea how good youll got it haha the weed now esp the exotic AAA shit would sell for $25-30/gram probually all day long, or hash oil $100/gram.
Anyways I got caught with a metal $5 pipe a sold to a kid in middle school on a friday but the kid brought it back to school and was pretending to use it in the lunch room and a fucking cop saw him playing with it, so the cop takes him and he snitches on me and I almost get expelled. My parents then took me to a psych Dr and the Dr put me on vyvanse 20mg (lisdextamfetamine) which is an amphetamine just like Adderall (DextroAmphetamine/LevoAmphetamine) D-Amphetamine is the feel good part of Adderall which adderall is 74% D-amp. Vyvanse is D-Amp attached to a protein so you have to take it orally for it to work, its made like that so kids can snort them like they do with adderall sometimes lol anyways I started experimenting with it and for me it wasnt great but 20mg the dose I ggot is prob equal to only 5mg of adderall to anyone whos tried it before. I didnt really enjoy it but didnt dislike it I guess.
When I was 14 the same person who got me into smoking weed for the first time also got me into using synthetic cannabinoids. Its known best probably in the USA as k2 or in Europe as spice. It was way cheaper then buying weed at $15-20/g when you could get a 3g bag of the shit for $15 and its way way stronger. The older original brands weren't as bad as they later got. Every time they banned the cannabinoids they were using the cannabiniods they used got worse/more dangerous/even deadly. The first kind I had was K2 Kush, which honestly felt very similar to real weed, it was great I loved it. Shortly after tho they banned the chem they were using JWH-018. and they started using AM-2201, HU-210 and others. Some of the 2nd gen blends I smoked were Kush, Scooby Snax, Cloud 9, Mr Nice Guy, Cautian, and a few others. Eventually those were all banned and the next wave of chemicals afterwards became much more fiendish, intense, dangerous, and even addictive with withdrawal symptoms after stopping use. One brand off the top of my head I remember was shamerocks. The last time I ever used any syn cannabinoids I accidently smoked a whole bowl of the shamerocks and I turned white and passed out. I had visions that I died and became apart of the universe. But I was okay with being dead because I knew my family and friends would eventually come to be apart of this universe with me. I was in this state that felt like it happenend forever time was so slowed down. But eventually I woke up, and had to puke as soon as I woke up.
I suffered from depersonalization for the next year or so where everything felt fake/not real like I wasnt alive and nothing is real. I begain to thing my heart was going to stop at any moment and had panic attacks everyday for weeks at a time. It fucked my world up, so I started doing different drugs to help numb it.
Later on the christmas before I turned 16 I found an 80z bottle of cherratusin in my house that was basically full (codeine/Guaifenesin) and is the shitty/nastier tasting version of lean which is codeine/promethazine. I drank it all that night/morning and played Halo 4 on Christmas day. That was the first time I did Opiates and I feel in love with the feeling it made me content, took the anxiety away and the depersonalization would be gone.
I later researched opiates/opioids and found someone who could get Vicodin 5mg (hydrocodone/acetaminophen) I was paying $5 per pill (overpriced) but I feel in love with the feeling. to me it was warm and fuzzy, the world felt perfect, it was blissfully numb.
Later on around age 15 to age 16 I started experimenting with all kinds of drugs. I got my own connect for weed this was around 2015 I was paying $15/g for the "good" stuff. One day my weed dealer asked if I wanted to try some white or cocaine and I said sure why not lol to me cocaine sucks unless is really high purity. I did a $40 bag worth then later on I bought a $50 all in one rock and read online how to freebase cocaine so I did it and made crack in a spoon and smoked it off foil and holy shit it was incredibly intense/felt so good it scared haha. I didnt do cocaine in any forum for a few years afterwatds.
My dealer had gotten some "Molly" which im not sure if it was true MDMA or if it was methylone (bk-MDMA) but holy shit I ate prob 300mg and was rolling fucking tits! I was rolling fucking balls. Made everything feel wonderful and loved everyone around me. haha I also later on experimented with LSD (Lyesrgic acid diethylamide) and mushrooms (psilocybin/Psilocin) I wont go into my experiences with psychedelics in this because they are both drugs and tools that can be used to help better yourself. Psychedelics changed my mindset for the good and really opened my mind up to new ideas and thoughts, and have taken to to places deep in my mind. I still trip every now and then most LSD and I order it off the darkweb because its so easy to do and the price.
Around this time my anxiety/depersonalization had gotten better, I still had it but as I matured mentally I grew stronger to learn how to deal with
Later on I found other plugs for (10mg hydrocodone) Vicodin/oxycodone (percocet 10mg) then found a plug for blues (Oxycodone 30mg IR) and Dilaudids (hydromorphone 8mg) and was snorting them for about a year till eventually I started IVing the hydromorphone bc both the blues/Ds were $30 each, however IVing a quarter of a D felt equal to a blue. So I started getting way more bang for mu buck, however eventually H moved into the town and all the hoods in my area started selling a ton of H (diamorphine) so I started IVing it then slowly they started adding fentanyl and related analogs such as acetylfentanyl/furanylfentanyl (got arrested with "fentdope"and they tested the dope in the lab and came back as furanylfentanyl) along with others and sometimes selling straight Fent instead of actual H (diamorphine). I hated getting straight fentanyl because MOST fentanyl and its analogs only last an hour or 2 MAX like youll be sober ina hour sometimes so Id have to re dose all day long, Making my tolerance skyrocket and having to spend tons and tons of money on the shit, sold everything I owe lived in a room with absolutely nothing of value because everything was gone. Ive easily spend $30k possibly on the shit, I started selling it/middlemaning too. Ive had to give 2 people narcan/breath for the other one bc they ODed.
Eventually tho; one time in May of 2018 I got some near pure either 3-Methylfentanyl/carfentanil strength stuff thats 1000-3000x stronger then morphine and lasts wayyy longer then normal fent like 8 hours long and ended up overdosing really bad. I was out for almost 8 hours before someone found me barely breathing the entire time. By the time someone found me and got me to the hospital I was flat linning, they did CPR on me for over and hour before my heart started working again, they gave me 20mg of IV narcan/naloxone which is 10x the regular amount for an overdose. But eventually they got my heart going again, it stopped again for another 5 mins but then they got it working again. The Drs gave me less then 10% chance to live and even if I did they told my parents I would be a vegetable. Also ended up having stage 4 kidney failure, my pee was black. Had to be on blood dialysis which hooks me up via IV to a machine that filters/cleans my blood for me so my kidneys dont have to and they can heal. They ended up giving me tons of morphine, fentanyl, and 30mg oxycodone every 4-6 hours, even tho at that time my tolerence was so high from my fentanyl habit, they atleast made things slightly bearable. Once I got out the hospital after my kidneys healed and was good after a few weeks. Once I got out I got onto suboxone (buprenorphine) which is a slow acting opioid itself for my opioid withdrawals and helps withe cravings a lot, I snort them and get a nice opioid "glow" during the day, I dont get fucked up or anything and Im super functional while on it. I still smoke weed/oil every now and then, ill use opana or similar pharma pill once every blue moon bc I know the dose, and I take xanax and will trip every now and then. I can honestly say im much better today then Ivve been in a long time.
I may update some parts or add more details to this story, like I said ive been in jail, Ive been homeless, Ive been in some very dark places. But ever since I woke up front flat linning my mood/personality has changed and my outlook on life has changed dramatically When I was at my worst in my addiction to opioids I didnt care about dying. . People wouldnt let me use around them bc they were worried ima OD with them in the car.
Anyways Id like to hear everyone's feedback. Appreciate it.
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